9/28/15 – Son’s Hurting

For the most part this weekend was a good one. Out with a friend for happy hour on Friday, and my kids the rest of the week. Unfortunately, I didn’t read the fine print on the MSA and Hunter has control of the 529’s. I email her on Saturday, and she emails me Sunday night about it. Blah, blah, blah…

The hard part was midday Sunday. Daughter takes an early nap and my son comes out of his room sad. I ask him what’s up, and he tells me doesn’t think I want to play with him.

I tell him of course I do, but can we play a real world game instead of his made up ones since I never know how to play those. He says ok.

I ask him why he thinks I don’t want to play with him and he says be used he thought I wanted to take a nap. I told him I was just watching the Charger game.

I ask him if mom plays with him and he said only if he asks. That’s what makes me different I usually ask. (Now I know I have to ask everyday he comes over – it’s routined now).

Then he goes on to tell me about how Hunter calls him “crap” “a crappy son” why does he always treat her like crap?” “She calls me crap a lot.” I have my arms around him – hugging him- and I feel his tears roll down my arm. I’m heart broken, but I can’t cry too. I need to just let it go and love him. Let him know that he is loved and safe and wanted in my home.

I try and tape him saying these things but he is uncomfortable so I stop. That’s when he tells me he wants to live with me and tell a judge. I tell him I will try but his mom won’t let it happen. I know with what his Psychiatrist said on Friday (that he will prescribe additional Abikify without my consent), and Jessie and Brittany from Haven House telling me they don’t care what I say they only care about what they see, there is no one to support me.

The worst part is Hunter has taken and hidden his Kindle and Solar System book from him for at least a week. Son says two, but Connie could only confirm the last week.

It’s so hard to sit here and see what she is doing to him. Eventually, this sadness will turn to anger inside him and then he will grow mean. Right now he is hurting and unable to control the neural storms in his head. Once that hurting grows cold and angry he is going to be a force to reckon with and Hunter will have no idea what a monster she has created.

Unless God intervenes, there is nothing for me to do but watch and detach from the pain. Just keep a safe house of love and joy for him when he is around. And pray that God will solve this mess before it’s too late.

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