Jeff seems uninterested in connecting even though he said he wanted to talk. Then again he never took any interest in me. The one woman I am attracted to seems to be a little more interested in me. Not sure why? She took a program from me and looked me straight in the eyes, and then walked by a couple of times when I was outside. Definitely a subtle flirtation.
Not sure what to make of it. She seemed disinterested, and now keeps looking at me every now and again.
Then again someone from 3040 showed up today. She is one of the few people I like that came over. She heard about the 40 Days of Prayer Campaign and stopped by. I guess one of the guys at church goes to 3040 or C3 and talked her into showing up. She is nice, and it’s nice to see someone that isn’t on Joy’s payroll. Tara didn’t show up. I’m sure she isn’t going to now that I asked her into a small group.
Thankfully, I got into a group down the street. The person running it is single and seems really nice. I don’t think word has gotten around that I’m leaving. That is probably for the best right now. Once I get the house on the market and some offers in I can start packing things up and moving into storage. It’s going to take some time.
Heidi still hasn’t responded to the emails. One of the pastors I spoke with on Friday thinks she is afraid I will leave. I’m sure I am one of the few people in her life that is somewhat healthy and she can count on. After everything she had done to me and all the hell she put me through she should have expected this. Borderline’s don’t understand how much they hurt others. So they can not fathom what they do to others to keep them around. If she would actually pay me the $1.2 million she promised to pay me I would stick around, but she cares more about money then God or honoring her commitments. That’s why she cheated, faked pregnancies, and suicides, and still wonders why I hate her. She is bat shit crazy somedays. The saddest part is I know that she will never get into heaven if she doesn’t pay me. Even she knows that, but her fear is bigger than her faith. I hope one day she figures it out before it’s too late!
For me it’s time to be free.
It would be great to get a little more for the house than I think I could get. I see prices in Ladera Ranch seem to be sliding. I think there is some over supply there right now. Aliso Viejo seems a little under supplied right now. I am sure God will start to do right by me soon. I’m not giving up on His dream for me, just changing the venue where I will doing it and doing some of it on my own.