It cracks me up that she is constantly looking at me in the meeting, but never before or after. It’s a game she like to play so that people feel we are on the same page. The saddest part is seeing the skin around her neck hanging down like an old person.

Today I am meeting with a recruiter for a job opportunity next Monday. I’m scared, but excited to see what the world has to offer. I know I have God’s heart and can read people without a lot of effort. That should help me in the future. I know people like people who are kind. My only issue is if Heidi dies I may never marry again. There are not a lot of people who are interested in taking care of a kid on the Spectrum and a daughter that has dyslexia.

There is a lot of work that needs to be done, and I need a lot of help to take care of the kids. This isn’t a fair life, but if I make it through to the end then maybe my reward will be there.

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

I guess I will never know the truth until it ends, and then it will be too late. At least I have a faith that believes in love, forgiveness, grace, and mercy. There are not a lot of people that feel that way about my faith. Most people are just hypocrites. They are bitter and mean and vengeful. That’s the reality at The Foundry at North Coast Calvary Chapel. Adulterer’s, Power Idolators, alcoholics, and drug users. No wonder God walked away from them a long time ago.

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