12/13/16 – Today Sucks

I just got a text from Heidi about taking the kids for an overnight on Sunday. She says it’s for a birthday party for a friend, but why an overnight for a Sunday. Nothing is open late around here on a Sunday.

I’m sure she is sleeping over at her boyfriends place or he is sleeping at her place. That or Heidi is hosting the party and she doesn’t want the kids there again.

What a horrible fucking mom?

Why can’t she just be nice to the kids in her own home? Because she is a selfish bitch. That’s why Joy is slamming me whenever she gets a chance. Same with Amanda. All fucking nut jobs, and I dated them all to make my life stressful. Actually, because I was unhealed.

I’m not that much healthier, but at least I understand why I did what I did. I can’t change it. I just need to deal with it.

I find it funny that she always asks me for help, but never provides it unless it is convenient for her. She still needs me to take care of her. 

I’m sure she will get used to me saying no. I’m not interested in helping her anymore unless she does the same. She never will. It’s not in her makeup to be generous or kind to anyone but herself. She will always be lost, and I need to detach from all this drama.

I feel like I need to leave the state for a while. Ben told me to, but I did not take his advice. Now I wish I could. Somedays are a nightmare for me. 

Heidi has a boyfriend. Joy has a soon to be fiance. Amanda is just bat shit crazy, and pretending to be happy. I know she’s miserable and hiding it. No one else knows because most of those single parents are messed up too. I just need a new life soon.

This one is not working for me….

My parents took the babysitting opportunity for Heidi so she can fuck her boyfriend. I let my parents know I’m no longer interested in a relationship with them. They always took my sister’s side as a kid and now Heidi’s side as an adult.

I’m done!